It was a moment that was years in the making. There I was, watching the young offspring of my “squad”—a group of women who met through work almost two decades ago—saying the Pledge of Allegiance at one of these women’s induction as a federal judge.  

I met my squad 16 years earlier at a law firm in downtown Chicago. Over time, the group grew and stayed connected, in part, because we automatically saw each other multiple times per week at work. We stopped by each other’s offices to problem-solve, met for pre-work runs, grabbed coffee or lunch to talk about our days. Today, this group of nine powerful, successful women serve as each other’s biggest work champions, trusted financial advisors, knowledgeable healthcare advocates, and family boosters. We’ve supported each other in negotiating C-suite jobs, writing books, landing board seats, starting our own businesses, and even, on this particular day, becoming a federal judge.

We were each other’s strength during so much of the pandemic—the pandemic that changed the way we work, and upended the format of life that created our bond. As I sat in the courtroom that day, I started to question, would I have ever met these incredible women in the current pandemic-created work environment? In this two-dimensional Zoom world can we, or future generations, still form these tight-knit communities? Without question, much of my success at work (and in life) is because for 20 of the last 23 years, I went to an office every Monday through Friday without thinking there was any other way.

THE LOSS OF ‘SOCIAL CAPITAL’ 

In a recent study, Microsoft analyzed a plethora of gains and losses as a result of the past few years in the pandemic work-from-home reality. One of the first elements they talk about is “a loss of social capital” in context of how decreased coworker connections and interactions impact the organization. This, of course, makes sense, but to take this a step further we should examine how the loss of “social capital” for the individual’s lifelong pursuits (after they have left that one organization) is far greater. The face-to-face networking, lunches, coffees, events, and water cooler conversations that I participated in for the bulk of my career all created the social capital that helped me in my job at the time; but clearly helped me even more in the totality of my career. 

And, while technology has always been part of my networking strategy (email follow-ups and social media interactions, more recently Slack channels, etc.), I know that the true strength of my relationships came from actually meeting people face-to-face, reading their body language, and getting to know them in a three-dimensional world. It’s not that I didn’t have digital-first relationships as a chief marketing officer of a global organization. I managed people all over the world; but the relationships that stuck from that time are the ones where we met in person, shared a glass of wine during a real-life discussion. For all of us trying to manage this hybrid-work life, we must recognize that the art of spontaneous get-togethers now seems nearly impossible.

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Pre-pandemic, there was no shortage of challenges for women in business: pay inequity, a lack of C-suite roles, and minimal BOD representation. Any progress we’ve made in these areas is largely because of the squads who help us make connections, and push us forward. But the studies are pointing to even more inequities caused by the pandemic: 52% of women in leadership are responsible for most or all of their family’s housework and/or childcare vs. 13% of men in leadership. So, as men advance, they do less household labor, they have more time to network, grow business, and expand their spheres of influence; women don’t have that luxury even as we continue to rise to the top. Women seem to forever be forced to dance, backward and in heels. 

‘FORCED TO DANCE BACKWARD’

As the reality of the post-pandemic workplace continues to unfold, I wondered how younger women will create these networks that will help them as they are forced to dance backward? The Women In the Workplace 2022 report found that a majority of women prefer remote and hybrid work. Here’s one very telling quote: “My company had us return to the office two days a week. But in my role, I mainly just need to work quietly alone. When I go back to the office, I don’t feel as efficient. There are so many interruptions. I know the social aspect is important, but getting work done is also important.” She knows the social elements are important, but still would rather work from home. And you know what, as a young person, I would have preferred to work from home, too. Getting dressed up, facing micro and macro aggressions, commuting, introvertedness; I didn’t want to be in an office either.  

But I didn’t have a choice, and for that I am truly grateful. Those years in a physical office served as an automatic 401k deposit of social capital in my career bank. The pandemic gave all of us the permission to not be present; to shun long-term investments of social capital; to ignore the career bank. The pandemic took so much, and now it may be robbing women of their future networks too—the ones that will lift them up and pull them through the complexities of work and life. 

Maybe younger Gen Zs will find success building squads through purely digital connections. Or, maybe the balance will shift back: According to a 2021 SHRM article, 64% of 500 U.S. college seniors polled want to work onsite most of the time or full time. I hope this is true and we as a society find a way to create a hybrid work environment that allows women to build (and re-build) our social capital 401k. We need to find a balance that combines the benefits of working remotely but creates space (literally and figuratively) for in-person networking opportunities that serve all of us so well. An office of the future where mentors, mentees, and peers share some coffee and critical conversation.

After our children said the pledge at the swearing in, my friend, the newly appointed Federal Judge, spoke of our group in the courtroom. She said that these eight women were part of the reason for her appointment to the bench; that us showing up to support this past decade is part of what helped her find success. In that humbling moment, I considered the circumstances and fate that brought us together. I fretted about the future of the younger women just starting their careers and while decades away, my own child’s work life. I do hope my daughter goes to an office for her job so she can try, learn, fail, and grow. I want her to have all the opportunities that in-person work created for me, including a community of women committed to helping one another succeed. Ultimately, I hope she finds her own squad.

Aimee Schuster is an entrepreneur and principal at Bandwidth Strategy, a fractional C-suite consulting group that empowers B2B organizations in growth mode.

April 8, 2023
Fast company